Here comes the king of the trolls
On a red-carpet of indemnified souls
Make way for the procession of deplorables!
They hang on his gilded coat-tails
They hang on every blustery word
This curious cross between Mussolini
P.T. Barnum and Harry Houdini
On goblins! On dragons!
Sound the alarm! Arm the klaxon!
Thump! Thump! Thump!
Fe fie Foo-foo
Freaking all the field mice
And bopping ‘em on the head
The Klan and 4-chan and the FBI, oh my!
They bet on the long shot
And Russia covered the spread
Enthroned in a castle of cards
With struts of silver spoons
The blowhard paper tycoon
Upgraded to full-scale typhoon
Well, they cultivated the piper
But he supplied his own pie, sir
And now he’ll call the tunes
The firmament shakes
Under the jackboot earthquake
The upset heard ‘round the world
Coup! Coup! Coup!
For ballots are cheaper than bullets
And puppets move faster than rockets
On 9-11 twin towers fell
In the apple of America’s I
On 11-9 another gaudy tower rose
To spill golden showers from the sky
Now we confront unbound Titans
Looming over compromised horizons
Now the map is swimming with red
As rough beasts slough off to Washington
Lining up at the trough to be fed
I’ll Putin twenty
If you’ll ante up the farm
For this is the land of plenty
And the bankers will come to no harm
Just make sure the bears keep their arms
The Second Amendment trumps the First
As clock and calendar are radically reversed
America’s a casino now
And all the chips are in
We’re stuck holding deuces
Who do you think will win?
So it’s time to build a wall
Around our three-thousand mile mall
Better not let those brown folks in to work
At labors the brown-shirts would rather shirk
Well, you know Nobody won the 2016 election
But the plutocrats made their selection
Missiles and seig heils
Rise to salute his improbable erection
A psychopathic half-wit driven to emit
A shit-storm of unfiltered excrement
But we hold it obvious and self-evident
That Douchenozzle J. Thumplethinskin
Has no business even being free
Let alone our last President
All braggadocio and bling
As real as professional wrestling
Authentic as a QVC zirconium ring
This bumbling parody of villainy
Blowing the trumpet of tyranny
Bearing all the legitimacy
Of a three-trillion dollar bill
America, meet your poison pill
Thump! Thump! Thump!