Dimension Not Available

When touring the Galaxy
Better remember these tips
Only the very strange
Seem to survive the trip
Never mind sudden shifts
Of gravity and hyper reality
Be sure you’re well prepared
To endure bad alien poetry

It’s one of those days
You wake up to find out
Your world’s in the path
Of an interstellar route
Condemned in the name
Of eminent domain
And all they can say
Is you had your chance to complain
Don’t wallow in gloom
This is no time to despair
Better get out the Guide
Plenty of other planets out there

That dimension’s not available
Insufficiently improbable
All Deep Thought aside
If you want to learn how to fly
That’s as easy as wormhole pie
The secret’s simply this:
Fling yourself at the Earth and miss
Just fling yourself at the Earth and miss

The ship you’ve hitched
Seems the worst possible place
Until you’ve been tossed
Into the void of outer space
The irony-laden Universe
So infinitely perverse
Just don’t you panic
‘Cause it can always get worse

And the Galactic President’s
A three-faced hustler
A shameless arrogant stud
And fugitive spaceship rustler
Once you see the lay
Of the Milky Way
Just like at home
The Galaxy’s ruled by clichés

That dimension’s not available
Insufficiently improbable
All Deep Thought aside
If you want to learn how to fly
That’s as easy as wormhole pie
The secret’s simply this:
Fling yourself at the Earth and miss
Just fling yourself at the Earth and miss

Better let all those little things slide
Beggars can’t be choosers
On interstellar rides
All you need is a towel
And a golden heart
But it helps to read
Multidimensional charts

Comic justice
It’s the only fair kind
In a Cosmos where
We’re all flying blind
The answer is
Forty-two, my friend
What did you say
The question was again?

That dimension’s not available
Insufficiently improbable
All Deep Thought aside
If you want to learn how to fly
That’s as easy as wormhole pie
The secret’s simply this:
Fling yourself at the Earth and miss
Just fling yourself at the Earth and miss